#2 - Is this the freedom you dreamed of?

Trying to "make it" in a world of opportunity (a.k.a. the hidden costs of the neoliberal script).

If you’re new to Untethered, it might help to read the previous post here.

Also, there’s now an Untethered Instagram page - it’ll be a pretty low-key affair, but feel free to follow along.

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Good Ideas, Bad Poetry.

Sometimes, when I’m trying to explain big ideas, I find myself writing silly poems.

I’ve found that the best way to get across an idea is to help people feel it first. And these poems seem to do that.¹

Occasionally, with a brain spilling over with academic jargon, I am suddenly possessed by the spirit of Dr Seuss’s slightly manic yet dim cousin and find myself spitting out line after line of very average poetry.

I wrote “Congratulations” (below) as a satire of sorts as I tried to describe the hidden script we are left with under the logic of capitalism. But the more I’ve shared it, the more people have fed back that they don’t find it that ridiculous. Or funny.² Some, myself included, have found it disconcertingly close to home.

I’ll leave you with it and see you on the other side.

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Congratulations!

Congratulations!

You have been born into a world of opportunity.
No matter where you begin, you can make it big.
Haven’t you heard of that one who started with nothing,
and made themselves into something?
If they can do it, why can’t you?
(But really, why can’t you?)

There’s everything you need here to make it big - so let’s get started.

You are free! You are an individual!
These are the truest things about you.
So, who are you? It’s up to you!
Great news - you get to choose.
In fact, you must choose.

But which you are you?
And what will you do?
Preferably something impressive.
Or, at the very least, interesting.
(No one likes a bore. What will you tell them at parties?)

Be ready to be asked, "So, what do you do?” a hundred million times,
because “Who are you?” and “What do you do?” are really the same question.
Oh, and whatever “you" you choose, best be good at being it.
I mean, if you aren’t good at being yourself, then really,
what does this say about you?

So, just quietly, ensure everyone else knows how well you’re doing.
“But won’t that look like bragging?”
Here’s the secret: just say you’re busy.

Busy is the answer.
The badge of honour. The proof you’re in demand.
Busy is how people will know you’ve achieved scarcity status,
there’s just not enough of you to go around.
“How are you?”
“Ugh, exhausted, run off my feet!”
Now that’s living!

Don’t forget, (as if you could),
this is a competition after all,
Survival of the fittest and whatnot.
It sounds cruel, but it really does bring out the best in us.
Sorts the wheat from the chaff.

Remember, there is no us; there is only you.

Hold tight to Rule Number 1:
There is not enough.
Not enough love.
Not enough money.
Not enough resources.
Others winning means you are losing.

And Rule Number 2:
Either you don’t have enough,
or you could do with more.
Yesterday’s fantasy will become tomorrow’s mundane.
There is no such thing as enough.

Let’s get personal.

You are your body,
everything rises and falls on what your body can do.
Babe! You are beautiful and wonderful and valuable and loved...
(as long as you are categorically beautiful and appear effortlessly wonderful,
and are productive enough to be valuable, then you will be loved.)

Your body is a tool, so put it to work.
Have you fulfilled your potential?
Reached your capacity?
Truly become all you can be?

Don’t rest.
Never rest.
This is a missed opportunity for getting more.
Unless you’re resting with purpose —
“Oh, I’ve just been so flat out.” or,
“I need to recover so I can get ready for that project in March.”

But a small word of warning:
don’t let your body break,
lest you end up one of them.
Those pitiable things who lay strewn, irrelevant, along the wayside.

Remember Tina? Me neither.
Heard she got all depressed.
God bless them; we love to help them out when we can,
- but perish the thought we become one of them!
Cap in hand, flapping about,
waiting for the mercy of others.

By all means give, be generous,
benevolent even,
This is the prerogative of winners.
But keep it charitable, preferably digital.
Never get bogged down,
entangled in the mire of other people’s problems.

Your greatest asset is fluidity.
Keep your options open,
stay nimble.

Do. Not. Commit.
Never commit.
Who knows what you might miss out on?
By all means, pencil things in,
“make plans”,
but don’t fall for the trap,
that enemy of freedom —
obligation.

You are free.
We’re all free!
Everyone can choose for themselves,
and is in charge of their own destiny.
There is no obligation outside yourself.

Stay free.
I mean it.
Be alert.
Be anxious.
If you are still for a just moment you might get left behind.

Relationships are assets, and should offer something back.
Some relationships are liabilities. Reconsider this investment.
After all, everyone is responsible for their own problems,
why should you be burdened by other’s ineptitude?

Of course, you, too, are responsible for your own crises.
Surely they are your fault.
don’t you have everything you need to flourish?

Sorry, that sounds mean.
Some of them aren’t entirely your fault.
I know they landed like an unwanted package at the wrong address.
Sadly, honey, they’re still yours.
They belong to you now,
and so are yours to solve,
to project manage,
to fossick for help where you can find it.

But as you do, I beg you.
Try not to be a buzzkill,
or encroach on our freedom.

Never forget the unspoken agreement:
“I won’t be a burden on you
if you won’t be a burden on me."
If all else fails, at least tell people you’re fine.
(It really is kinder to everyone.)

By all means, stumble, but dear God, do not fall.
Who on earth would catch you?

And above all, do not trust.
To trust is to risk being let down,
or turned away.
To trust is to risk forgetting that in the end,
you are responsible for yourself.

Because ultimately, you are an individual.
You are alone.
Responsible for your success,
alone with your failure.
Surrounded by others who may admire,
who may care, who may even be close.

But when push comes to shove,
they don’t owe you anything,
because they are individuals too.

You are alone.
This is the truest thing about you.

Congratulations!
You are an individual!
You are free!

Now go be the best you you can be.

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“Congratulations” is an attempt to describe a very particular story of the world that we are soaked in. If any of it resonated with you, I want to make it absolutely clear that I am describing a cultural narrative, not a personal failing.

It is not the only story; it lives in conflict with many others. But it is a powerful story and not one of our personal making. There are reasons for its existence that I’ll unpack throughout this project.

It is full of promises — some of which it delivers on — but it is not honest about the price we pay for them.

And I’ll say this many times throughout this project: We cannot shame our way out of this story. We have been sold it and bought into it for some very good reasons, to meet some very real needs. But there are other stories of our “selves” that are better for us all. Not always immediately easier, but certainly better.

Take some time; reread it if you need to.

Notice what your body is telling you as you do. Think of a friend that might resonate, share it with them, and spark up a conversation. Are there lines that speak to them that didn’t to you?

We’ll talk more in the next post, but in the meantime, I’d love to hear what hit home for you.
-You can leave a comment below.
-You can select a few lines and press “restack” or “restack with a note” if you want to say why.
-You can message me through Substack or email: theuntethereddillema@gmail.com.³

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1. Apologies to my actual poet friends for bastardising your gift to the world.

2. Which is fine, because I am used to this. My wife is trapped in a marriage where one of my main goals is to see how terrible a joke I can make and still get an extremely reluctant laugh/groan.

She calls it “infuriating”, whereas I call it “a crucial long-form social experiment/guerilla theatre”. Tomayto, tomahto.

3. Life circumstances mean it may take me some time to get back to you, but I promise to read everything.